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Kellyanne Conway’s Husband Appointed to Justice Department

Mar. 17, 2017

Kellyanne Conway’s Husband Appointed to Justice Department:  Donald Trump will soon name top White House adviser Kellyanne Conway’s husband, George, to lead the Justice Department’s civil division.  One thing’s for sure, you can bet your bottom dollar that as soon as he assumes the post, all microwaves are gonna be removed from employee cafeterias.


New AI Program Can Lip-Read Better Than Humans:  Google and Oxford University have reportedly developed an artificial intelligence system that can lip-read significantly better than humans.  Researchers caution that the system is not expected to work on chickens, because chickens don’t have lips.  As soon as the program is released, its a pretty safe bet books on ventriloquism are gonna start flying off the shelves.


Owner Offers $20K Reward for Exotic Savannah Cat:  An exotic Savannah cat – which is a cross between a domesticated cat and a wild African serval cat – has gone missing in Marina Del Rey and his owner is willing to pay $20,000 to get him back.  While I hope they get him back, my guess is Trump had him deported.  As a precaution, the Department of Fish and Game is warning Marina Del Rey residents who may be raising wildebeests or antelope to be on the lookout and protect their herds.

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